Being a pregnant server is quite interesting. I've passed the phase where people couldn't tell if I was overweight or pregnant. The phase where they were too afraid to say anything, so they just stared. I was just waiting for the first guest to be brave enough to make a comment or ask about pregnancy. I couldn't wait to say I wasn't pregnant and watch them squirm. (Apparently, this is my idea of fun in the workplace.)
The first to say something was a regular, a man who comes in with his family. On my way to another table, he stopped me and excitedly inquired, "So, when are you due?" I stopped, put on my best confused face and stuttered, "Um, I'm not, uh, pregnant." His wife looked utterly horrified. He, still relaxed, fired back, "I asked the bartender first, you think I'm stupid?" Slick. Very slick.
Now that I'm obviously pregnant, the comments come freely. The strangest so far has been from a 50-something year-old woman.
Leslie: Would either of you care to see the dessert menu this evening?
Woman: Yes, sure.
Leslie: In addition to the desserts on this menu, we have a special. It's a White Chocolate Cherry Bread Pudding. It's served warm on a light white chocolate cream, and is absolutely delicious.
Woman: Pause, staring at me with small, odd smile. Then pointing to my belly: Soooooo, is that Bread Pudding in there... or a BABY?
My response can be found in the title of this post.