Who has table 13? Your mom.
I don't know whose sidework is glassware. Your mom's.
Who can take my shift on Saturday? Your mom.
Who is this? Your mom.
Where'd Kim go? Your mom's.
Who left their crap on expo? Your mom.
It's like a song you can't get out of your head – for years. I can't stop answering every question or statement with: your mom. Most of the time I keep it in my head. But sometimes it just slips out. Usually to the person whose mom passed away, or the person whose mom I know. And I think, "Ohhhhh, Mrs. Bradford! I'm so sorry. I didn't really mean YOU."
It's like a song you can't get out of your head – for years. I can't stop answering every question or statement with: your mom. Most of the time I keep it in my head. But sometimes it just slips out. Usually to the person whose mom passed away, or the person whose mom I know. And I think, "Ohhhhh, Mrs. Bradford! I'm so sorry. I didn't really mean YOU."
This happened just now, as I was typing:
Who's supposed to design all these web ads? Your mom.
A hispanic guy I work with was making fun of a cook last night and I piped in, at an appropriate (inappropriate?) time, with: A la casa de tu madre.
That really happened! Holy crap, the sickness has no language barriers!
I am 36 years old!
Ugh, sorry, Dumbledore. Just. Can't. Stop.
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